A whole new world....

...don't you dare close your eyes...
Evidently not as you wont be able to read this.
Unless you have one of those packages that reads words out to you.
Which means you are either blind, and i wonder why you staggered on to here, or you are a juvenile person who uses such packages to read sweary bits you type on Microsoft word.
Anyway I'm digressing from the point.

I thought id start blogging on here as a more respectable way of recording my thoughts than doing bulletins etc on myspace, as no one reads them as they aren't a quiz that's designed to brag about your sexual escapes without the obvious hatred a simple statement would bring. In fact i would applaud such work. if someone posted "i gone and fucked john last night" i would congratulate them. In my head of course. Not replying back, it would be awkward as it would be seen a chance to boast to a man less sexually fortunate what went on. A simple nod of appreciation would suffice.
The words are literally falling out of me. No editing here! Which is why this isn't going very well.
I can always adopt the workplace approach when things go wrong of "I'm terribly sorry, but its my first week!" Although the first part of that sentence is rarely used these days. Manners.
Their need is long gone. A skill no longer required. If someone is in your way, simply charge past them tutting. The louder the tut, the more words of anger/apology it stands for.
Anyone reading this would think probably that I'm an embittered middle aged man grasping on to the technological age a bit later than everyone else, but still determined to bloody well go for it.
I'm not. I'm 26.
Mid-twenties crisis. Where the whole world suddenly makes sense. Young people are stupid, old people are slow. And the bit in the middle where i currently reside is a state of wishing i was young again so i could be stupid too and regretting the days i spend far too long in supermarkets shuffling past the houmous.
Why do old people even go near the dips? Their palettes can bear comprehend tomato sauce.

I promise ill make more sense next time.
There might even be a theme!
Oh imagine that!